You’re young, ambitious, and ready to find a man who will actually lead you towards Jannah, not drama! But hold up. Not every guy who throws around “MashaAllah” and “Sister, lower your gaze” is Prince Charming. Some of them? Walking red flags with a beard!
And guess what? The Hadith already warned us about these types. So, before you get too emotionally invested, let’s break down 10 major red flags straight from Islamic teachings. Ready? Let’s go!
1. He’s All Talk, No Action
He flexes his “Deen” on the ‘Gram but doesn’t even pray Fajr? Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ) said: “The most beloved of deeds to Allah are the most consistent ones, even if they are small.” (Sahih Bukhari)
If his Islam is just for show, sis, run! A true believer isn’t about aesthetics, he’s about action.
2. He Treats His Mom Like a Queen but You Like a Servant
Yes, a man should respect his mother (obviously), but if he expects you to be his unpaid cook, cleaner, and therapist while he does nothing? NOPE.
Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ) said: “The best of you are those who are best to their wives.” (Sunan Ibn Majah)
Best. To. Their. Wives. Not just their moms. Balance is key!
3. He Has a Haram Relationship History But Expects You to Be an Angel
Oh, so he’s had a “past” but wants you to be a perfect, untouched diamond?
Islam teaches that both men and women should guard their modesty. Allah says in the Quran: “Tell the believing men to lower their gaze and guard their private parts.” (Quran 24:30)
If he judges you but excuses himself? Hypocrisy is not cute.
4. He Uses “Deen” to Control You
“Sister, you can’t work. It’s haram.”
“Sister, you can’t have opinions. It’s not feminine.”
EXCUSE ME?! Islam honors women. The Prophet (ﷺ) worked for Khadijah, a wealthy businesswoman! If he’s cherry-picking Islam to control you, he’s not a leader, he’s a dictator.
5. He Has a Short Temper (And Blames It on You)
If his anger is quicker than his dua, . The Prophet (ﷺ) said: “The strong man is not the one who can wrestle, but the one who controls himself when angry.” (Sahih Bukhari)
If he yells, slams doors, or “punishes” you with silence? Sis, that’s emotional abuse. Bye!
6. He Hates Giving Gifts But Expects Them
The Prophet (ﷺ) literally said: “Exchange gifts, as that will lead to increasing your love for one another.” (Sunan al-Tirmidhi)
If his idea of “romance” is a WhatsApp “GM” text while expecting you to shower him with love? No, sis. You deserve better.
7. He’s Broke on Purpose
Struggling is one thing. Laziness is another. A man is responsible for providing for his wife. The Prophet (ﷺ) said: “It is sufficient sin for a man that he neglects those whom he is responsible for providing for.” (Sunan Abu Dawood)
If he’s waiting for you to be the breadwinner while he “finds himself”? That’s not a partner, that’s a liability.
8. He’s a “Harami” With His Finances
Haram money = haram blessings. If he’s gambling, scamming, or dealing in interest-based income, . The Prophet (ﷺ) warned us about riba (interest), calling it one of the greatest sins (Sahih Muslim).
A man who doesn’t care where his money comes from won’t care where your marriage goes. Think about it.
9. He Doesn’t Take Marriage Seriously
“Nikah? InshaAllah one day, sis.”
RUN. The Prophet (ﷺ) said: “Marriage is half of faith.” (Sunan al-Bayhaqi)
If he’s keeping you on “standby” while casually enjoying your emotional labor? That’s not a man. That’s a time-waster.
10. He Has No Taqwa (Fear of Allah)
This is the biggest red flag. If he doesn’t fear Allah, what makes you think he’ll treat you right when no one’s watching?
The Prophet (ﷺ) said: “The most complete of the believers in faith are those with the best character.” (Sunan al-Tirmidhi)
Marriage isn’t about “vibes”, it’s about values.
Protect Your Heart, Protect Your Iman!
Now that you know the red flags, let’s talk about solutions. If you want a truly Islamic marriage, you need to set your standards HIGH. And guess what? There are tools that can help.
Check out HalalMatch, a Muslim matrimonial platform that actually prioritizes faith and character. Say salam to high-quality matches and goodbye to walking red flags.
What’s the Biggest Red Flag You’ve Seen?
Drop your thoughts in the comments! Have you ever met a guy who checked all these boxes? Let’s talk!