Alright, sisters, let’s be real, marriage is one of the biggest decisions of our lives. And while we may have our dreamy Pinterest wedding boards and “ideal husband” checklists (tall, bearded, and prays Fajr on time, am I right?), the Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ) actually gave us some solid, time-tested, red-flag-avoiding, soul-saving advice on choosing the right man.
So before you entertain that “brother” in your DMs who only sends you “Assalamu Alaikum” with no follow-up (sir, what do you want?), let’s go over five powerful pieces of advice straight from the best role model in history, our beloved Prophet (ﷺ).
1. Looks and Money Are Temporary. Character is Forever.
The Prophet (ﷺ) said:
“A woman may be married for four things: her wealth, her lineage, her beauty, and her religion. Choose the one who is religious, may your hands be rubbed with dust (may you prosper).” (Bukhari & Muslim)
Translation? That six-foot, gym-bro with a six-figure salary might seem like a dream, but if his Taqwa is at zero, you might just be signing up for a nightmare. The Prophet (ﷺ) made it clear, faith and character are non-negotiables.
Red flag alert: If his idea of “religion” is just posting Islamic quotes on Instagram but not actually living it, girl, run.
2. If He Has Bad Manners, Run Faster Than WiFi Drops on a Rainy Day.
The Prophet (ﷺ) said:
“The best of you are those who are best to their wives.” (Tirmidhi)
Not “the best of you are the ones who flex their cars,” or “the ones who make you laugh but can’t control their anger.” Nope. The best men are the ones who treat their wives well.
So if he’s sweet to his boys but dismissive, rude, or worse, manipulative, towards women? Pack your emotional bags and bounce.
3. A Real Man Won’t Waste Your Time.
A man once came to propose to a woman during the Prophet’s (ﷺ) time, and she asked about him. The Prophet (ﷺ) warned her:
“As for so-and-so, he does not put his stick down from his shoulder (i.e., he beats women), and as for so-and-so, he does not have money.” (Muslim)
Did you catch that? The Prophet (ﷺ) was straight-up honest about who was not marriage material.
Lesson? If a man is stringing you along, “not ready” after three years, or just giving you vague answers about commitment, he is not the one.
4. If He’s More In Love with Himself Than Allah, You’re in Trouble.
The Prophet (ﷺ) said:
“When someone whose religion and character you are pleased with comes to you (for marriage), then marry him.” (Tirmidhi)
Notice how the Prophet (ﷺ) didn’t say “when someone with the best fade and designer wardrobe comes to you”? Nope. He emphasized faith and character because a man who fears Allah will treat you right even when no one is watching.
Red flag alert: If he brags more about his gym gains than his prayers, he’s probably not ready for a real relationship, at least, not one that leads to Jannah.
5. You Deserve More Than Just “He’s a Good Guy”, You Deserve The Best.
One of the greatest love stories in Islamic history? The Prophet (ﷺ) and Khadijah (RA). And guess what? Khadijah didn’t settle for some “average” man. She saw his character, honesty, and faith, and she made the first move (yas, sis!).
If you’re worried about being “too picky” or “waiting too long,” remember this: The Prophet (ﷺ) never advised women to just settle. He advised them to choose wisely.
Red flag alert: If everyone is saying, “Oh, he’s a nice guy,” but your gut is saying, “something feels off,” trust yourself. Your heart and your faith deserve a man who elevates them, not drags them down.
Final Thoughts: Choose Jannah Over Temporary Thrills.
Sisters, love in Islam isn’t about fairy tales and endless romantic gestures (though those are nice too!). It’s about building a partnership that gets you to Jannah. The Prophet (ﷺ) already gave us the checklist, now, it’s up to us to use it.
So the next time someone asks you, “Why are you still single?” just smile and say, “Because I’m taking the Prophet’s (ﷺ) advice.”