Ladies, let’s be real. Finding the one isn’t just about butterflies and aesthetic couple goals. This is your forever we’re talking about, aka, no trial period, no refunds, no “let me speak to the manager.” If you’re a young Muslim woman dreaming of a husband who’s not just a pretty beard but actually husband material, you need some solid guidance.
And what better place to find it than in the words of our Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ)? Buckle up, because these seven Hadith are about to revolutionize your checklist.
1. Deen Over Dollars, Always
“A woman is married for four things: her wealth, her lineage, her beauty, and her religion. So choose the religious one, lest you be ruined.” (Bukhari, Muslim)
Translation: If money, looks, or family status are your top priorities, you’re setting yourself up for heartbreak. The guy with the strongest iman is the real prize. He’ll treat you right because he fears Allah, not because you guilt-tripped him into buying you that new abaya.
2. Good Character = Marriage Insurance
“The most complete of the believers in faith are those with the best character.” (Tirmidhi)
Your future husband’s six-pack won’t matter when he’s raising his voice at you. But his patience, kindness, and respect? That’s what’s going to hold your marriage together when life gets real. Look for the man who treats waiters with respect, stays calm in traffic, and doesn’t ghost people when they need help. That’s husband material.
3. No Drama Kings Allowed
“The strong person is not the one who overcomes people by his strength, but the one who controls himself when he is angry.” (Bukhari, Muslim)
If he punches walls, threatens to leave over small arguments, or turns into a soap opera villain when things don’t go his way, run. Marriage is about patience, not WWE smackdowns. If he can’t control his temper now, don’t expect a miracle after the nikkah.
4. He Should Know How to Love
“The best of you are those who are best to their wives.” (Tirmidhi)
If his idea of “being a man” is being emotionally unavailable, then next. The Prophet (ﷺ) was the ultimate husband, he listened, joked, and even raced with his wife Aisha (RA). Love in marriage is more than just romance, it’s how he treats you daily, especially when no one’s watching.
5. His Friends Say a Lot About Him
“A person is upon the religion of his close friend, so let one of you look at whom he befriends.” (Abu Dawood, Tirmidhi)
His squad is a preview of who he really is. If they’re constantly chilling at shisha lounges, trash-talking their wives, or acting like life is one big boys’ trip, expect zero responsibility from him. But if his circle consists of men who remind him of Allah? That’s a good sign he’s on the right path.
6. He Should Be Responsible, Not a Man-Child
“Each of you is a shepherd, and each of you is responsible for his flock.” (Bukhari, Muslim)
Does he take responsibility for his actions? Or does he blame everything on the government, his parents, or his “bad luck”? A husband is supposed to be a leader, not a liability. If he still expects his mom to do his laundry, be prepared to become his second mother.
7. Your Heart and Gut Should Be at Peace
“Righteousness is in good character, and sin is what wavers in your heart and you hate for people to find out about.” (Muslim)
If something feels off, don’t ignore it. That gut feeling isn’t just paranoia; it’s wisdom. Istikhara isn’t just a ritual, it’s an open line to Allah for clarity. If he’s right for you, you’ll feel a sense of peace. If he’s not, you’ll feel uneasy, don’t gaslight yourself into ignoring that.
Bonus: Want to Make This Search Easier?
Let’s be honest, filtering through potential spouses is exhausting. But what if there was a way to meet men who already fit these hadith-backed standards? [Insert Product/Service Recommendation Here, e.g., a Muslim matchmaking app, a book on finding a righteous spouse, or an Islamic premarital course.]
This isn’t about lowering your standards or “settling.” It’s about making smarter choices now so you’re not crying over regrets later.
Your Turn: What’s YOUR Top Green Flag?
Now, I want to hear from you! What’s one must-have quality you’re looking for in a husband? Drop it in the comments below, let’s build a dream husband checklist together!
Or if you’re in the middle of this search, check out [insert recommended product] to make this process way easier. Because sis, your future happiness is worth it.