Alright, ladies! Let’s be real. We live in a time where every other motivational speaker on TikTok is telling you to “guard your peace” and “protect your energy.” And while those phrases sound good enough to slap on a mug, how do you actually apply them when it comes to friendships with guys? Especially when Islam has already dropped some wisdom on this topic over 1,400 years ago!
Don’t worry. I’ve got you covered. Let’s dive into 7 Sunnah-approved ways to set boundaries with men, with a sprinkle of humor and a dash of seriousness. (And no, it’s not just a list of “Don’t do this, don’t do that.”)
1. The “I Respect You, But From a Distance” Rule
You know how the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) said, “It is better for one of you to be pricked in the head with an iron needle than to touch a woman who is not permissible to him.” (Sunan al-Kubra 14567)? Yep, it’s that serious. It’s not about being rude; it’s about guarding your modesty and respect. Because trust me, if the Prophet (PBUH) said it, it’s worth considering.
2. The “No-Flex Zone” Policy
Yes, social media counts! Just because it’s a DM instead of an actual conversation doesn’t make it any less real. The Prophet (PBUH) said, “When one of you is alone with a non-mahram woman, Satan is the third.” (Tirmidhi 2165). So, while replying to that “Hey, what’s up?” DM might seem harmless, it’s better to leave him on read and focus on the deen instead.
3. Lower Your Gaze, Not Your Standards
Ladies, we know the struggle. You’re just out here trying to buy your groceries, and BAM! Mr. Handsome walks by. But remember, the Quran says, “Tell the believing women to lower their gaze and guard their private parts.” (Surah An-Nur, 24:31). It’s not about being awkward or unfriendly; it’s about keeping your standards high enough to prioritize your relationship with Allah (SWT).
4. Keep Conversations Purposeful
“Hey, just wanted to ask if you did the homework.” “Yep, I did.” Conversation over. Islam doesn’t say you can’t ever speak to men. It just emphasizes keeping it purposeful and limited. No need to exchange life stories with the guy who borrowed your pen once in college.
5. Politeness, Not Over-Friendliness
Politeness? Absolutely Sunnah-approved. Over-friendliness? Not so much. You can be kind and respectful without being overly friendly. The Prophet (PBUH) was known for his kindness and gentle speech, but always within the limits of decency. Keep it kind, keep it halal.
6. The “Accountability Partner” Hack
Got a sister who’s also working on her deen? Great! Make a pact to hold each other accountable when it comes to interactions with men. It’s much easier to maintain boundaries when someone’s got your back.
7. Remembering the Ultimate Goal
At the end of the day, it’s all about pleasing Allah (SWT). Every boundary you set, every awkward moment you avoid, it’s all to protect your faith and dignity. The Prophet (PBUH) said, “Modesty is a branch of faith.” (Muslim 35). And modesty doesn’t just apply to clothing, but to how you interact with everyone around you.
Final Thoughts
Setting boundaries doesn’t make you a prude, weird, or “too religious.” It makes you someone who values their relationship with Allah (SWT) above all else. And honestly? That’s the real flex.
So, ladies, are you ready to implement these Sunnah-approved hacks in your daily life? Let me know your thoughts below!