Let’s be real, sis. You don’t have time to waste on the wrong guy. And let’s not even get started on the emotional damage, late-night tears, and the Why did I ignore the red flags?! moments. Your heart is precious. Allah commands us to protect it. But in a world where a “salam, sis” can turn into “you’re my soulmate” overnight, how do you actually guard your heart?
If you’re tired of getting caught up in situationships, love-bombing, and DM-da’wah bros, then grab a cup of chai, because I’m about to give you five fail-proof Islamic ways to keep your heart intact while waiting for the right one.
1. Lower Your Gaze (Yes, Even on Instagram)
I get it. That brother has a recitation voice smoother than honey and a jawline carved by angels. But sis, staring at his perfectly curated ‘humble’ selfies is not going to bring barakah into your life.
Allah says in the Quran:
“Tell the believing women to lower their gaze and guard their chastity…” (24:31)
Why? Because your eyes are the gateway to your heart. The more you gaze, the more you imagine. The more you imagine, the more you attach. And next thing you know, you’re daydreaming about his last name with yours.
So, next time your finger hovers over that follow button, ask yourself: Is this leading me closer to Allah or closer to a heartbreak?
2. Set Boundaries (And Actually Stick to Them)
Saying “we’re just talking” is like saying “I’m just holding fire but I won’t get burned.” Spoiler alert: you will.
The Prophet (ﷺ) said:
“A man and a woman are not alone together but the third of them is Satan.” (Tirmidhi 2165)
This isn’t paranoia; it’s prevention. No ‘friendly’ late-night texts. No ‘halal’ flirting. No ‘it’s just a study session’ one-on-one meetups. If he respects you, he will respect your boundaries. And if he doesn’t? Boy, bye.
3. Ask the Right Questions (Interrogation Mode: Activated)
So, you’re interested in someone for marriage? Great. But don’t let butterflies in your stomach replace common sense.
Ask the real questions:
- Do you pray all five daily salah?
- What’s your relationship like with your mom?
- What are your views on gender roles?
- Would you rather fight one camel-sized duck or ten duck-sized camels? (Because, why not?)
If he dodges the serious questions but can talk for hours about his gym routine? Run.
4. Involve Your Wali (Because Wisdom > Feelings)
I know, I know. You’re an independent woman who doesn’t need anyone making decisions for you. But sis, your wali isn’t your enemy; he’s your protection.
A good wali will catch what you miss. That charming brother might have a great smile, but does he have character? Your wali can see through smooth talk, empty promises, and fake piety faster than you can say “mashAllah.”
And if the guy refuses to involve your wali? Emergency exit immediately.
5. Make Dua & Trust Allah (Your Soulmate is Already Written)
You can swipe left, right, up, and down, but if it’s not written, it’s not happening. And if it is written, nothing can stop it.
The Prophet (ﷺ) said:
“Know that what has missed you was never meant to hit you, and what has hit you was never meant to miss you.” (Tirmidhi 2516)
Instead of stressing over who likes your Instagram story, put your energy into dua. Pray Istikhara. Ask Allah to protect you from anyone who isn’t good for your dunya and akhirah. And if that means losing someone you really wanted? Trust that Allah has someone better.
Final Thoughts (Because Sis, You Deserve Better)
Guarding your heart isn’t about being cold, unapproachable, or never getting married. It’s about valuing yourself enough to protect what Allah told you to protect. It’s about knowing that real love is built on taqwa, not texts.
So, tell me, have you ever ignored a red flag and regretted it later? Drop your stories in the comments (no judgment, we’ve all been there ). And if you want a practical guide on finding a spouse the halal way, check out this amazing book on Islamic marriage that breaks it all down step by step. Trust me, your heart will thank you later.