Ladies, let’s get real. You’ve been texting this guy for months. You’re wondering if he’s serious about a future or just enjoying the free emotional labor you’re providing like a never-ending Netflix subscription. Well, let’s dive into the good stuff and find out what’s really going on. Buckle up, sis!
1. He Talks About Marriage… Or Completely Avoids It
You bring up marriage and suddenly he’s dodging like you just threw a flaming basketball at him. Huge red flag! But if he’s actually talking about marriage, meeting your family, and making things halal , girl, that’s a green flag!
Islamic Insight: The Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) said: “When a man proposes marriage and you are satisfied with his religious commitment and good character, then marry him.” (Tirmidhi) , If he’s not even mentioning marriage, it’s time to move on.
2. He’s All About Late-Night Texts & Zero Real-Life Plans
Ah, the infamous late-night “What’s up?” texts. Somehow, he’s got time for casual conversations but never enough time to meet your family or discuss actual plans. If his attention comes with a “midnight only” policy, he’s probably just wasting your time.
Islamic Insight: Islam encourages clarity and modesty in interactions. If he’s only reaching out when the moon’s high and the distractions are low, something’s off.
3. The ‘Let’s Keep It Secret’ Guy
He’s all sweet and charming in private but wants to keep things low-key. Translation? He doesn’t want to make a commitment or he’s simply not proud enough to be seen with you. Let’s be real, sis , if you’re a secret, you’re not his priority.
Islamic Insight: Islam teaches us to be open and honest in intentions. If he’s playing the secrecy game, he’s not following the Islamic way of a respectable, clear proposal.
4. He Only Compliments Your Looks
“Wow, you’re so beautiful.” “You have the prettiest smile.” And repeat. Sure, flattery is nice, but if that’s all he ever talks about, his interest is probably skin-deep. Does he care about your values, your dreams, your goals? No? Then boy, bye.
Islamic Insight: The Prophet (PBUH) valued character and faith over mere appearance. A man truly interested in marriage will admire you for your piety and character, not just your looks.
5. He Avoids Family Introductions Like the Plague
You ask him when he’s going to talk to your wali, and he suddenly pretends his Wi-Fi just died. If he’s not willing to speak to your guardian or family, he’s just not serious. Period.
Islamic Insight: Islam places importance on family involvement and seeking the approval of guardians. A man with sincere intentions will willingly approach your wali.
6. He’s Never Discussing the Future
If his future plans are all about “someday” and “maybe,” then girl, he’s just stringing you along. A real man with marriage on his mind will have clear intentions, not just wishy-washy conversations.
Islamic Insight: Intentions matter! The Prophet (PBUH) emphasized clear intentions and sincerity. A man interested in marriage will speak honestly about his plans.
7. He’s Pressuring You to Compromise Your Values
Anyone trying to lead you away from your principles is a definite no. Islam is built on mutual respect and righteousness. If he’s testing your boundaries or trying to make you compromise your faith, run like there’s a lion chasing you!
Islamic Insight: Allah says in the Quran: “Do not follow the footsteps of Shaytan…” (Quran 2:168). If he’s pulling you away from your deen, he’s not worth a second of your time.
8. He’s Consistent & Transparent (Or Not)
Consistency is key. If he’s always around, showing real interest, making genuine efforts, and speaking with clarity, then he might be the real deal. But if his attention comes and goes like cheap Wi-Fi, it’s time to re-evaluate.
Islamic Insight: The Prophet (PBUH) was known for his honesty and clarity in all matters. A man truly interested in marriage will reflect those qualities.
The Bottom Line?
If a man is genuinely interested in marriage, he’ll make it clear from the start. If he’s dodging marriage talks, giving you shady excuses, or only valuing you for surface-level things, then honey, he’s just wasting your time.
You deserve someone who appreciates you for your deen, your character, and your dreams. Don’t settle for less than that. And remember, trust in Allah’s plan , the right one will come when the time is right.
Stay strong and stay wise, sis!